Tomorrow

Well, it looks like this is really going to happen. Today I'm fasting and cleaning out my system so I'll be glad when this is over.

I'm concerned about Erika - she's so worried!!

2 More Days!

Only 2 more days until surgery - I can't believe it's finally here. I started taking Celebrex yesterday and it has helped my back tremendously - I can walk again! Today is the last day that I can eat so I better make it a good one LOL. I'm craving hot dogs so I'm eating them. I feel so guilty eating something so bad but it sure tastes good!

Getting Closer

We'll it's only one week away and the final countdown begins. I have everything I need for after care and all those pesky details are completed. All that's left is to record my measurements and begin the surgery prep beginning on Sunday.

Nicky finally started school yesterday and had a pretty good day. He sounded excited about all the fun he had and he especially liked the science class, just like his Grandma! He'll do well if he ever learns to listen.

We had our company picnic on Saturday at Ora Mae Harn park and everyone had a great time - except those of us who had to put it together. It was so hot, my back hurt so bad because I can't take any Advil and it was just miserable. I left at 12;30 because I was sick - probably heat stress. I'm just glad it's over.

The Countdown Begins

Today I had my pre-admission testing that was very easy. Bloodwork and an EKG. I've filled all of my prescriptions, got most of the supplies and my protein. I'm almost off the caffeine and I'm not taking any ibuprofen but it's very hard because my back hurts so bad. So I'm ready to go.

I'm leaving power of attorney to Erika and have also suggested Erika buy my house. We'll see.

Another Day Closer

Today was my pre-op with Dr. Chaisson so he gave me the prescriptions and I had to sign the consent form. The third paragraph are general sugical risks - Death, heart attack, pneumonia and pulmonary embolus. The next says peri-operative risks are conversion (having to cut me open instead of using the laparscopy), bleeding, bowel injury or splenic injury. Next is post op wound infection, abscess, stomal stricture or need for re-op. The last is long-term risks wound hernia, nutrition related conditions, stomal ulcers, bowel obstruction and failure to lose all weight. HHMMMM I hope I'm doing the right thing!
BUT the one thing I wanted to make sure I told him was that I had a lung collapse 30 years ago - it may be important information.

Steps

Today I bought my Fleets to clean out my system the day before surgery. I remember doing this the day before a colonoscopy and it was not very pleasant. Besides tasting awful I really got nauseous and cold. It does, however, clean you out!!!!

I also bought my chewable vitamins, some 4x4 gauze pads and Burts Bees lip balm. I'll need to get some prescriptions filled that the Doc is giving me tomorrow and I have to get some liquid calcium yet.

I'm drinking my water, taking my vitamins have started practicing the breathing exercises.

Getting Closer

Well, I read the book and watched the DVD and it was very informative. I went out today and bought some of the vitamins that I'll need and will start taking them now. I'm also working on drinking my water.

Eg is nervous for me - I don't know how to calm her down and have even considered putting it off for awhile so she's not so upset. She thinks if I try Weight Watchers just one more time I'll be successful - I've tried at least a dozen times and I'm still fat!! Drastic times call for drastic measures!

Progress

Today I picked up my book and DVD from the surgeons office. I have to reveiw on my own because there's no time for me to attend the meeting with Gayle Duke, the program coordinator. There's some good information in there, particularly about what to do prior to surgery. I can't take Advil 2 weeks prior or even after surgery because it's not good for the new stomach. Dr. Chaisson is supposed to be giving me a prescription for pain on Thursday at my preop visit.

Gosh, I'm so excited I can hardly wait!!

Surgery Date!

Well, it looks like it's really going to happen. My surgery has been scheduled for October 1st. I can't believe it. I'm scared, nervous, excited, anxious and hopeful all at once. Of course there's many emotions that I'm not even aware of yet.

Maybe I should go back to church - I really liked it. Now I feel like such a loser because I didn't follow through with my obligations.....

Hurry up and wait!

Sonia, the program coordinator at the Southwest Surgery, says I should hear something about my surgery approval this week - wow, she's fast! So now I'm trying to prep - drinking protein and taking my vitamins. She asked when I'd like to have the surgery and I answered "tomorrow" so she understands that I'm anxious, aren't we all?

My precious grandson, nm6, was telling a story to his mother. It starts "I have a friend and her name is Grandma" - sweet, huh? He's a great kid!

Another Step

Tuesday I attended the required support group for WLS and found it to be very informative. Much to my surprise I ran into Dr. Krasner and his wife, who weighs probably 350-400 pounds. Her surgery is scheduled for October 2, since she's self pay there's not much of a waiting period.

The Program Coordinator, Sonia, called to tell me that my primary doctor faxed in her note page instead of the referral. I call Vicki right away and I'm sure by now she's sent to correct letter. When Sonia receives that she will submit for insurance approval - once approved the surgery date is set. That approval can take anywhere from 3 days to 3-4 weeks - here's hoping and praying it's quick!!

In the meantime I'm beginning the preparation for surgery. The WL group says its easier for surgery if you loose 10% of your body weight because that will shrink the liver. Dah, if I could loose 25 pounds I wouldn't have the surgery! But I'll try again. I'm also starting to taste test the liquid protein that I'll be taking for the rest of my life. I found Profect to be good but since tastes change after surgery I won't stock up yet. I will, however, begin taking the protein everyday in the recommended amounts. I also need to start drinking more water. WL group says divide your body weight in half and that's how many ounces of water your to drink daily. OMG - that's like a gallon a day!!!! So, I'm starting to get into that habit also. I've purchased some B-12 sublingual and am taking that daily to build myself up. Daily multivitamin with iron is also now a part of my daily routine. Walking 30 minutes a day sounds so easy but with back pain that is near crippling, it's a daunting task! So I'll walk 10 minutes at a time on the treadmill.

I'll be taking a before picture this weekend - from all angles - yuck!!!!!

My Weight World

I want to write down the reason I want to have the WLS and the effects the excess weight is having on me so if I ever start to falter, I can read this for a quick reminder.

Being overweight takes a real toll on my body, physically and emotionally. The physical reasons include breathing difficulties, walking difficulties and struggling to complete the activities of daily living (ADL). At work I walk to the front office, about 150 feet and I'm out of breath and sweating. My back is beginning to hurt already today but I arm myself with 2400 milligrams of ibuprofen every day, I can't imagine what my liver looks like! Of course, there's the other maladies, high blood pressure, high cholesterol and borderline diabetis. I think I have sleep apnea because I wake up every night gasping for air, frequent morning headaches and feeling tired all the time. I have lost my "zest" for life as the struggle to get through everyday becomes harder and harder. When it gets real bad I reach for my "comfort food" which is the core of my problem to begin with. A very vicious circle. 50 pounds ago I could work in my yard for hours, weed whacking or just cleaning. Now I'm lucky to work more than 1/2 hour, which wears me out for the day. Putting my shoes and socks on is a struggle, getting dressed makes me sweat and working is almost impossible. But that's just the physical, the emotional...

Looking in the mirror everyday and not liking what I see. Knowing that the people I meet view me as fat. Confidence is non-existant. Going out dancing is not a reality right now and it's what I love to do. I'd love to feel the warm touch of a loving man. That's another story that I won't get into at this moment.

I want to play with my grandson, shop with my grandaughter, go dancing with friends. I want to shop in a regular store and buy beautiful dresses and shoes. I want to go for a day at the spa and go on a trip to Italy. All I really want to do is stop thinking about losing weight!!! JUST DO IT!